Elf Birko was a nice happy elf, who was good, kind and worked very very hard. Santa’s workshop was always fun and productive, with Elf Birko being awarded ‘Elf of the Month’ on numerous occasions.
That was however, until he discovered alcohol. Elf Birko soon turned from an important member of society into a lazy, ill tempered and obnoxious layabout.
After numerous warnings from the factory, it was Santa’s unfortunate task of firing Elf Birko.
“Please don’t let me go dear Santa, I can change! I’ll give up the booze, I’ll join Alcoholics Anonymous! You can’t turn me away, tomorrow’s Christmas Day!”
Santa mused on this. It was the season of goodwill, he was once a good employee, and he had a lot to thank him for. He couldn’t bear to tell him to leave all that he knew and once cared for..
So, he released the hounds who chased Elf Birko far far away, thus making the decision for him.
And so, the moral of the story is, Santa is a horrible horrible man, and he’ll set violent animals on you if you’re bad.